The Doppler Effect

Monday, April 21, 2008

As a fire truck zoomed past my workstation, its deafening siren filled my ears and shook my mind.

I was actually tired from a long day at an event yesterday and got home quite late because we had a family dinner. I was woken up early by my mom, so, as you can see, I still haven’t gotten my well-deserved rest I’ve been waiting for all week. It’s a weekend for goodness’ sakes.


Oops. Another telephone call. I really don’t get much idle time at work - well, I really shouldn’t be anyway so there. Poor me. Stuck in a clerical job I never really wanted. Okay, maybe I wanted it for a time - at first, to be more precise. Why? Because of the money. Not that it’s big or what, it’s just extra money anyway. A little money to help out at home. I didn’t know much about what I had to do then. The job was so far from what I do -- from me -- I never really imagined myself sitting here making receipts and counting money. Well, okay, I can imagine myself counting money... but not for others. Hours passed, days, weeks. And here I am bored as hell with my job. I realized that I really didn’t want it -- but what can I do? I already said yes. I already committed myself to it. You can’t just always back out and give up.

It is at these times, when the siren is closest to you, that you hear it completely, fully, with all its rigidity and loudness. It is when you know it for what it is and take it in wholly. But these moments are very brief -- much shorter than when you can hear the siren from afar: arriving, and then leaving once again. So you really have to decide -- fast. Are you listening?

I think I'm not anymore.

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random thoughts @ 12:31 AM


Joelle. 19. Sober.


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